


cold in my kingdom

by softiee



Category: Star Wars - All Media Types, Star Wars Original Trilogy
Genre: Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Angst, Darth Vader's A+ parenting, Emotional Hurt, Father-Son Relationship, Imperial Luke Skywalker, Luke whump, Other
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-01-21
Updated: 2021-01-21
Packaged: 2021-03-12 11:40:51
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Graphic Depictions Of Violence
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,133
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28884783
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/softiee/pseuds/softiee
Summary: Luke is reckless. He makes the mistake to return to the abandoned rebel base in Hoth, and gets injured by an abandoned mine. Vader comes to save him, but makes sure his son never makes the same mistake again.
Relationships: Luke Skywalker & Darth Vader
Comments: 13
Kudos: 179
Collections: 2020 Star Wars Luke & Vader Winter Exchange





	cold in my kingdom

**Author's Note:**

  * For [Slx99](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Slx99/gifts).



> hey!!! i'm back with more angst because... why not!!!  
> this piece belongs to the Luke & Vader 2020 fic exchange.  
> this is for slx, hope you like it! <3

The cold is crushing him. His body burns, the wounds open over the freezing cold of the snow. Coming back to Hoth had been undoubtedly a terrible idea. Luke tries to lift a hand to reach his comm unit, biting his lips to contain a scream as he does so. His entire body aches, and he knows he doesn’t have long until his body goes in shock. He needs to call Leia, or Han –no, Han is _gone,_ and isn’t that the source of the problem?–, anyone who might be able to rescue him. He can’t die like this, wounded and sprawled over the snow _again._

He’s an idiot. Luke realizes that now. He must be a complete and utter imbecile. People have lied to him his entire life, because there’s no way he got this far with a brain as slow as his. Of course there would be leftover mines outside the deserted Rebel base. Of course the Empire would have left traps set for anyone stupid enough to go back to check the base. It’s a miracle he’s not dead. The Force warned him a second before the explosion went off, and he was able to jump a considerable distance, avoiding most of the fire. But the blast had gotten him, and his body had jumped through the air like a ragdoll before he collapsed into the cold and unforgiving snow. 

The communicator is broken. Luke lets out a curse as the stupid piece of burnt metal crumbles in his hand. He could try and crawl in the direction of the ship, but any movement at all feels like pure agony. His ribs are shattered, his legs broken, his entire skin feels like a single bruise. He can’t really hear much, the explosion must have pooped his eardrums. He can barely see through the blood that falls from his forehead over his eyes. 

For a second, panic overtakes him. He’s going to die. There’s no way out of this: he’s digged his own grave and he’s going to die in this stupid planet product of his stupid mistakes. He’s going to die alone and there’s nothing he can do about it.

It feels fitting, somehow. To fail so badly. Luke failed his masters, his friends, his allies, everyone. The last of the Jedi, the galaxy’s last hope, gone in a bloody mess of his own mistakes. 

Maybe R2 will find his body and signal the Alliance to come and pick him up. Maybe he'll have to bury him himself. The thought fills him with dread. 

As his consciousness starts to drift off, Luke thinks of his father. Of the man he thought he would be. The daring pilot, the powerful Jedi, the great hero. All the things Luke tried and failed to be. And he thinks of the man his father _really_ is. The great shadow of terror and violence, who even in his most triumphant moment, offered Luke a place by his side. 

Closing his eyes, Luke reaches out. In the privacy of his mind, minutes away from death, nobody can judge him. He expands, feeling the cold wastes around him, the atmosphere, the stars beyond that. The great silence that plagues the galaxy. Somewhere in the outer rim he can sense Leia through their weak bond, but she’s closed off, concentrating on her problems. He expands further, and then…

 _There_. Closer than he expected, the roaring storm of Darkness that surrounds Vader signals his presence. As soon as Luke touches the edges of the storm, all that attention turns to him, sharp and demanding. 

Luke almost smiles, pain bleeding all over his expanded consciousness. Instantly, he can feel Vader’s alarm. 

_Luke,_ his father demands. _What is wrong? Where are you?_

 _Father…_ , he thinks, _I’m so sorry._

Acute and clear panic comes from Vader’s force signature. _Luke,_ he demands, _are you hurt? Where are you?_

He can no longer feel his legs. Maybe ending it this way is for the best. 

_I’m sorry,_ he repeats. _I’m sorry I wasn’t what you wanted._

Grief and regret come from Vader’s side of the bond. And overwhelming sadness. Luke bathes in it: it’s the closest thing to love he has ever felt from his father. But as soon as he feels it, it disappears behind a durasteel wall. 

_Where are you?_ Vader demands again. _Luke, please, where are you?!_

Luke opens his eyes. He sees the vast snowy wastelands of Hoth, almost like he was seeing them for the first time. He sees them with his eyes and with _his_ eyes. He makes his father see, feeling petty and cruel, that this is also his fault. 

Vader says something Luke can’t quite grasp, – _ADMIRAL, SET COURSE FOR THE HOTH SYSTEM IMMEDIATELY_ – and he realizes it wasn’t meant for him to hear. 

With a gentleness Luke didn’t know his father was capable of, Vader sends a brush of reassurance through the bond. 

_I’m coming, little one. Stay strong. I’m coming._

Luke closes his eyes again, and drowns in infinite darkness. 

***

He’s surprised to wake up. He feels like he's floating in a cloud, not entirely here or there. Luke's mind wanders the blurry edges of his consciousness, confused. 

Where is he? 

He can hear through what it feels like cubic meters of water. There's faint machine noises, a rhythmical beeping, and some voices talking to each other. The acid smell of bacta permeates his nostrils. He can't make sense of anything. 

A cold but gentle breeze brushes against his mind. 

_Rest, little one._ _Sleep._

Luke is too tired to disobey the command. 

***

It happens three more times before Luke is finally able to wake up properly. He has no idea how much time has happened, he doesn't know where he is or how he is even alive in the first place. His body still hurts, but it's more of a muted ache in his bones, and not the burning pain from before. 

Luke opens his eyes. His head still feels floaty, he must be under some kind of pain medication. He’s on his back, resting in some kind of medical facility. There’s machines all around him, tubes and cables connecting to different parts of his body, monitoring all his vital signs. He doesn't recognize the place, maybe he’s on a Rebel base he hasn’t been to before? 

He tries to reach out with the Force, but finds that he can't. Frowning, Luke tries again, concentrating on expanding his senses outside of his body. 

He _can't._ Like a wall of ice, he's closed inside his own self. He can't feel anything beyond his own mind. Not even the constant humm of the living around him. Never in his life he’s felt more trapped. Even when he was little and he knew nothing of the Force, it had always been a constant companion, the whispers of the living always on his mind. 

Panic threatens to overwhelm him. Luke doesn’t know what’s wrong. As his heartbeat begins to rise, and his breathing accelerates, the machines around him start beeping like crazy. 

A door slides open. Luke sees a doctor in imperial uniform, and the panic doubles in intensity. The man makes a call through a wall panel, probably requesting for backup, and rushes over to Luke. He takes a syringe from a nearby table and injects something on the IV line connecting to Luke’s elbow. 

Luke tries to stop him, but the man is fast. His shoulders drop, his breathing slowly going back to a regular rhythm, and he falls back into the pillows. 

The doctor takes a few steps back and starts taking notes on his datapad. Luke tries uselessly to move, but his entire body feels like it weighs a million tons. He’s awake, whatever the man gave him wasn’t meant to knock him out. It’s probably a tranquilizer of some kind, or a paralyzing agent. 

It feels like hours until the doors of the medbay slide open again. A big shadow crosses the door, heave steps approach the bed, and a repetitive artificial breathing sound fills the silence. 

With a hand gesture, Vader indicates the doctor to leave them alone. As the doors snap shut behind the man, Luke closes his eyes, cold dread filling his chest. 

His father approaches the bed and sets a glove hand on top of Luke’s. He wishes he could rip it out of his grip, but all he can do is watch. 

“You’re safe, little one,” Vader says. Luke thinks anywhere else in the galaxy would be safer than by the Dark Lord’s side. 

“I apologize for the inconvenience,” his father continues. “Restricting your access to the Force is an aboherent act. It's a denial of your nature, and of your birthright.” 

Luke’s eyes sting at the edges, and he can’t do anything to stop the tears from slipping down his face. Vader moves a hand, as if he wanted to wipe the tears from his cheeks, but he seems to think it twice and moves his hand away. Then, he sits in the chair next to the bed and collapses his massive body into it. 

His cadaverous mask focuses his attention on Luke. He clenches his fists tightly on his lap, and Luke feels the temperature of the room drop a couple of degrees.

“But I can’t have you running away from me again,” Vader says. 

Luke lets the tears run free. 

*** 

After that, everything changes. Any hope Luke had of escaping is quickly extinguished by the inability to use the Force. Luke is sure that his father is using some kind of drug to keep him at bay, and that fills him with rage. 

After spending another week in the medbay, Vader takes him to a horrible castle in the middle of a planet that looks like it came straight out of his nightmares. Endless rivers of burning lava flow around the building, and the whole place cries out in a constant agony of creation and destruction. The planet is a nest of darkness, twisted and incandescent. It is almost a mirror of Vader himself, his brilliant fury transformed into reality. 

There, Vader trains him. At first Luke refused, and every time he was punished for it. He’s left without food, or in isolation for days, left in the sole company of his own mind. Without the comfort of the Force, it’s torture. In the end, he accepts the training. At least in those sessions, Vader arranges for his dose of whatever they give him to block his Force connection to be lowered. The training is painful, intense and relentless, but Luke at least can have the Force back with him, and it feels like the first droplets of water after a long dry season. 

A long time passes before he tries to escape again. Any attempt made before had been squashed as soon as the thought had left his mind, but this time it's different. 

He enters his father’s control room, his hands behind his back over the firm fabric of his black imperial uniform, and stands in the doorway. 

“You summoned me, my Lord,” Luke says. Vader insists he call him father, and Luke will find any excuse not to do so. 

Vader stands in the middle of the room, surrounded by holoprojectors that show images of battle maps and reports. He’s focusing on one in particular, and Luke can’t help but wander his eyes through the rest of them. 

There, in a corner, he can see something different. A report that has the Alliance logo on it. The words “siege”, “bombardment” and “Organa” jump to his attention. 

“What is that?” Luke asks before he can stop himself. Vader turns around and follows his line of sight. 

"Rebel activity," Vader says, sounding bored, and goes back to his taks. "It's being dealt with."

Luke walks up to the holo and reads the report. There's been an uprising in Ryloth. Syndulla and the Freedom Fighters have destroyed two Imperial facilities already. They're being supported by the Alliance, and there is visual confirmation of Princess Organa's presence. High Command has authorized a blockade and bombardment of the settlements in retaliation. 

_Leia!_ And not only her, where she goes Lando and Chewie must have gone as well. They're in danger, Luke has to–

Before he can finish reading, the holo disappears. Luke blinks and turns around, anger rising like a flame.

"Bombardment of an entire population? Really? Is this how you deal with your problems?" Luke demands. 

“Do not concern yourself with such matters, young one,” Vader answers without looking at him.

“They’re my friends!" he insists. "You can’t do this!” 

Vader makes a sound the vocal recorder of his helmet can’t interpret, and turns his body to face Luke. “They’re not your _friends,"_ he shoves a gloved finger into his face. "Not anymore.” 

“What?" Luke gasps, feeling at complete loss. "Why?”

Vader straightens his posture, towering above him like a giant. “Because I said so.” 

Luke stares into the ground, seething with fury, as he hears his father abandon the office, leaving him alone. 

That night, he tries to escape. Luke hacks into the main computer systems and deactivates the security cameras. He disables the patrol droids and unlocks the doors to the hangar. He eluds all the traps and makes his way to a ship. Luke can almost taste freedom as he ascends through the atmosphere and into the air, the ship cutting through clouds of ash. 

He can see Mustafar from space, red and furious, an open wound in the interconnected field of the Force. And as he punches the coordinates into the navicomputer, at the edges of his mind he _feels_ it. Rage, explosive and incandescent, that shatters his shields like a plasma blade. 

Vader knows. 

But it’s already too late. The computer finishes its calculations and the ship jumps to hyperspace. 

***

The sad part is, he actually thought he could make it. 

Of course Vader would know where he was going. Luke was that predictable. And of course he would have warned the fleet stationed above Ryloth to intercept him as soon as he jumped to real space. 

Luke does his best to avoid the TIEs and stay as far away from the Star Destroyers as humanly possible, but he’s only one pilot against hundreds. But he’s survived impossible odds before, and this time he manages to elude them long enough to crash into the surface of the planet, closest to where the reports of Rebel activity had been. 

The ship is destroyed, but he doesn’t need it. It wasn’t even his. _Force,_ he misses R2. 

When a group of armed individuals, covered in robes, wraps and hoods to conceal their identities and protect them from the heat, surround him with their blasters pointing at his face, Luke raises his hands in surrender.

“I’m a friend,” he says. “I’m here in peace.” 

***

They don’t believe him. 

Of course they don’t. They say he’s compromised. He has spent too many months in Imperial custody. He’s clearly wearing their uniform, and he hasn’t been imprisoned. At least, not traditionally. Syndulla and his men are not like Leia or Mon Mothma: they’re ruthless, and they don’t trust easily. So they take him to a cell, chain him to the floor, and beat him until he stops resisting. After spending weeks with what Vader considers a strict training routine, their definition of violence feels almost welcome. 

When they finally allow Leia to talk to him, it’s too late. There’s a shadow that just entered the system. 

“You need to leave,” he says. She looks at him like she’s seeing a ghost. “Run, now.”

“What about you?” she asks. Luke knows he’s breaking her heart by asking her to leave him behind, but he also knows she’s strong enough to do it anyway. 

“I’ll be fine,” Luke lies. “He won’t hurt me.” 

She argues for what it feels like an hour with the rest of them, but at the end they all leave him behind. They want to stay and fight, and Leia conveniences Chewie to jump into the _Falcon_ and leave. Luke stays in his cell for what it feels like hours, chained to the floor, feeling stupid and miserable. 

That’s how Vader finds him. Luke is too embarrassed to look at his face. His father drags him from the floor, his metal hands gripping his arms like shackles, and takes him to a shuttle outside. The blaring sun blinds him for an instant, and when he adjusts to the light Luke can see countless bodies scattered outside the base. They’re all mangeld and twisted, because Vader didn’t cut them down with his lightsaber, he just crushed them with the Force. 

Luke wants to vomit. His father doesn’t say a word, and carries him inside the shuttle, that closes behind them with a hiss.

***

They’re standing on the bridge of _The Executor_ when Vader finally speaks again. 

“I’ve tried being patient with you,” he says, his voice dangerous. Like the calm of a predator who’s staring at their prey, ready to strike. “But you’ve proven to be more stubborn than what’s tolerable. It’s time I teach you a lesson, my son.” 

Vader makes a gesture with his hand, and Admiral Piett nods. 

“You may fire when ready, Admiral.” 

Luke’s blood freezes. He feels the ship underneath him shake with power, and he turns to see out of the viewport. Hundreds of thousands of laser cannons shoot at the surface of Ryloth, and the entire surface planet trembles. Luke can feel millions of voices crying in terror, until one by one they disappear into nothingness. 

He turns and grabs his father by the arm, desperate. 

_“I don’t understand,”_ Luke cries. “Why are you doing this? 

His father doesn’t answer. Luke tries to shake him, but Vader is like death itself: unmovable, unforgiving, eternal. Luke then tries kicking him, ignoring the scandalized looks he’s receiving from the officers aboard the bridge. 

That makes Vader lose his patience. His father turns and grabs him by the shoulders, moving him out of the way. He then lifts his chin with a gloved hand, nailing his metal fingers on his skin, and holds his face directly in front of his.

"If I had to burn the entire galaxy to the ground just to keep you safe, little one,” Vader swears, his voice low and powerful, invading the entire room, _“I_ _would."_

Ryloth burns. 

It’s the first of many. Every time he escapes and sets foot on a planet, Vader bleeds it dry. With time, Luke learns his lesson. He has to stay by his father’s side. It’s safer that way. The blood of a million beings is not worth his freedom. It’s the price he has to pay for his mistakes. 


End file.
